Somewhere To Put My Plug
Hey Jack if you're in the mood for some vacuuming you can stop by. I guess hoovering is British for vacuuming. Don't they confuse the Hoover vacuum with hoovering. Wouldn't it make more sense for someone to be hoovering with a Hoover? First Cheryl catches him going through her panties. He certainly seemed to like them and next while he's vacuuming and looking for another place to put the plug he walks in on Cheryl who was getting dressed. Um Jack you might want to knock next time.
I guess decided to jump Team Cindy when he found out about her and Darren. I know he was trying to help but he only made matters worse when he went over to see her and told her that she wasn't getting another penny out of Tony aside from the shop. Now this just pissed her off so she's going after him for every penny he has. Now this would be where a prenup would come in handy but wait I think there was something about them not having prenups in England or something. Will she get half since that's how they do it here? So much for an amicable divorce. Hey where's Olivia I mean Gaby?
Jack gets the idea of buying The Dog back but he isn't the only one with this idea. I guess great minds think alike since Cheryl's thinking about buying it herself. It would be perfect because she could move upstairs and live in the apartment or as you Brits say the flat above the place. But isn't that where Gilly's living? At least he was living there but now with the Ashworths gone he might be homeless. He asks Tony if he'd be interested but I think he'll have his hands full with Cindy.
Anita gets kidnapped again this time by Kyle since he wants to know who the father of Theresa's baby is. She doesn't know but assumed it was his but of course it isn't since they never had sex. In British would it be they've never had shag? I might know some British but I'm not fluent in it. So of course she wants to find Theresa but Kyle broke in but at least he doesn't seem to be in the mood to burn the place down which he'd threatened to do. Oops she spilled the beans about killing Calvin which isn't good. Well the guy is pretty scary since he's worried about the gun but the cops already have it. As for Gormless Tit I can't think of a more fitting person to take the blame.
Well that was mean Cindy making a remark about Theresa's weight when she was looking for something to wear to Calvin's funeral. Damn that's taken a long time. She said something about hitting the biscuit tin. It still sounds odd when I hear the word biscuit since I don't think of cookies and instead think of a biscuit which is in the roll family and something you get at KFC with your chicken. Oh yes that's a good way to have someone return for more clothes but of course this seems to be the only clothing store in the village so I guess it doesn't matter how big of a bitch she is.
Lauren's in the hospital which is where I'm thinking most people end up after falling down the stairs. Okay some might end up at the morgue. I guess it depends on how many steps since I've fallen down the stairs too but that was oops I missed a step because I couldn't see thanks to the laundry basket being in the way kind of fall. She has a blood clot which Leo doesn't bother to tell her about so Lauren just assumes she'll be out in time for Calvin's funeral. At least Sasha showed up although no one's too happy with her for fooling Spencer like that since that was just cruel to make him think he had sex with Lauren who I believe is still underage and got her pregnant. But maybe the underage thing is different since you can drink when you're eighteen. I do wonder if Leo will actually stop drinking. He did throw the booze out.
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